Three Rules for Watching The Handmaid’s Tale

If, like me, you enjoy watching TV that emotionally wrecks you and leaves you curled up in a ball staring blankly into space then I have good news for you! The first two episodes of season two of The Handmaid’s Tale are available on Hulu. Season one ended last year leaving all of us devastated and desperate to know the fate of Offred (or June), who is now pregnant and just led a small rebellion by refusing to stone another Handmaid to death. I wish I could tell you that season two starts off on a more positive note, but it’s just as emotionally devastating. In fact the opening scene of the first episode is one of the bleakest and most terrifying sequences I’ve ever seen on television. I can’t imagine the show will change its tone anytime soon so I’ve compiled a list of simple rules to help us all survive the emotional turmoil this show puts us through. Follow my suggestions, and I promise you’ll feel slightly less depressed.

hanging handmaids better

This happens in like the first ten minutes. It’s ok if you’re already crying.

Rule #1: Do not binge!

This show is not made for binge watching. Hulu clearly agrees with me on this point since they only release two episodes every week, but trust me no one should watch more than a single episode in a sitting. The subject matter is too heavy, the circumstances too dark, and the images too chilling. If you watch multiple episodes without a break in between I promise that you will dissolve into a puddle of your own tears and fear sweat. Take a break, and return to the show when you’ve put yourself back together and are ready for your heart to be torn open again.

The Handmaid's Tale

Your heart, your ear, any body part is on the table really

Rule #2: Pick a happy show to watch immediately after

Before you even sit down in front of your television (or computer or phone or however you kids watch TV nowadays) pick out a TV show that makes you happy and queue it up to start right after you finish that episode of Handmaid’s Tale. Once the episode ends, you’re going to be overcome with feelings of despair and darkness. It’ll seem like there’s nothing good left in the world, but your happy show will remind you that goodness does still exist, at least in the universe of that show. I recommend a good 30-minute sitcom, something that’s lighthearted and full of optimism, like The Good Place or Parks and Recreation. Who knows you might even be able to muster up a giggle. (I doubt it though. The Handmaid’s Tale is real frickin’ dark.)

dark sadness

There is no joy left in the world. You’ll never laugh again after this scene.

Rule #3: No eating during the episode

I learned this the hard way. One of two things will happen if you eat while watching The Handmaid’s Tale. You’ll either become so upset that food will begin to disgust you and turn to ash in your mouth. Or you’ll start to stress eat and then the entire bag of Doritos is gone and now you feel sad and gross. Either eat before you watch and try to keep that food down or eat afterwards and hope that the food will bring you a small bit of joy in this world full of evil.


I know earlier I promised you that these rules would help ease your despair but that was a lie. Maybe my rules won’t work for you. Or maybe this show doesn’t cause you to fall into a deep depression that you’ll never escape from, in which case you’re a monster and I don’t want you reading my blog anyway. All I know is that following these rules is the only way I’m going to make it through this season of The Handmaid’s Tale without losing my already loose grip on sanity, and I hope that maybe they’ll help you too. Happy watching!


Why Trixie Mattel Deserved Her Win

I’m back! If you know me at all you know I love some good drag. So after the final episode of RuPaul’s Drag Race All Stars aired last night, I simply could not stay silent. Everyone’s tweeting and instagramming #shangelawasrobbed and I’m here to tell you why you’re wrong. Trixie Mattel fully deserved her win.

deal with it

The return of the eliminated queens as a sort of tribal council jury was a new twist to a season of All Stars, and the eliminated queens’ picks shocked everyone, myself included. I had Shangela and Trixie picked as my top two since BenDelaCreme excused herself from the game, so it was a surprise when Kennedy and Trixie faced off in the final lip sync.

oh y'all wanted a twist

I clearly wasn’t the only one shocked by this turn of events either. Social media is blowing up with arguments about how Shangela was robbed of her rightfully deserved win, and I won’t argue with anyone who says that, but you can’t tell me Trixie Mattel didn’t deserve that win too. During Trixie’s first appearance on Drag Race in season 7, I wasn’t immediately blown away by her performance. For some reason, she isn’t always able to shine in the show’s challenges. It wasn’t until I watched her YouTube show, UNHhhhh, cohosted by the equally delightful and weird Katya (another queen who arguably deserved to win her season of All Stars), that I became a diehard Trixie fan.

When the All Stars lineup was announced, I exclaimed to everyone I knew that Trixie Mattel would be crowned the winner and if she didn’t I was going to riot in the streets. I’m glad that I can now gloat about how I was right along, although I do honestly feel bad that Shangela didn’t get a chance to lip sync for her legacy. When it comes to track record on the show Shangela does come out slightly ahead of Trixie. She won more challenges than Trixie, it’s true, and she won each lip sync as well. Trixie’s only lip sync win came in the moment when it mattered the most, and it was definitely the best lip sync I’ve seen her perform. Although Shangela won more lip syncs, she only won one more challenge than Trixie, and they were both in the bottom twice. So their stats in the show are closer than people give them both credit for.

The real reasons for Trixie’s win lies outside of the show. While Shangela is certainly successful outside of Drag Race, she’s appeared on a variety of TV shows, movies, and released quite a few songs, Trixie is arguably more successful. She created an immensely popular YouTube series, which transitioned into her own TV show on Viceland and headlined her own comedy tour. But the most significant achievement of Trixie’s career for me was the release of her first album. Trixie Mattel is a drag queen that released a COUNTRY music album. That’s never been done before. (Except by Dolly Parton of course.) dollyMost fans of drag overlook this accomplishment because they simply aren’t fond of country music. It’s not unusual for queens to release music but that music is typically pop, something that’s funny and good to dance to in a club. But Trixie Mattel is writing genuinely good country tunes that are sweet and heartfelt. Go listen to her albums and tell me I’m wrong. I dare you.

Overall, Shangela is a perfect example of what drag is. She’s campy, she can sing and dance and make you laugh, but what about her is new and original? Trixie has an image and brand that is clearly defined and original, even if people don’t like her makeup or style you can’t say that she isn’t unique. Although some argue that her look is too limited, this season she tried new things while still looking like Trixie Mattel. She put on a red lip red for filthfor the Red for Filth runway and even wore brown hair for a challenge! She’s willing to expand what Trixie can look like without sacrficiing her image. Trixie is expanding what drag can be and taking it in new directions while staying true to her drag aesthetic, and Drag Race has always rewarded queens that do that.

Shangela truly deserved to win All Stars, but so did Trixie. If you’re upset about the finale, don’t hate Trixie and don’t hate the show. Go look up Shangela’s tour, listen to her songs, and buy her merch. Support your favorite performers. Don’t spread hate.


And remember, if BenDela hadn’t left the show all of this would be moot.


the true winner

That new Star Wars trailer looks pretty freaking cool

I have to preface this post by saying I’m not a huge Star Wars fan. Yes, I grew up watching the original films, and they hold a small special place in my heart but there are certainly franchises that I care about more deeply. However, it would be foolish of me not to take a moment to at least acknowledge the new trailer just released for The Last Jedi. It looks pretty freaking badass to me.

rey rock gif

I enjoyed The Force Awakens just like everyone else, but we all know it’s basically just a retelling of A New Hope. I’m not bashing The Force Awakens for being that though. The similarities between the two films served an important purpose. It ignited a nostalgic passion in old fans by reminding us why we love the original films while introducing us to new characters. It also gave new fans a chance to acquaint themselves with the overarching themes and form of the Star Wars franchise. Now that old and new fans are onboard, The Last Jedi has a chance to divert from the past and create something new for the franchise.

Screen Shot 2017-10-09 at 10.44.57 PM

Kylo, baby, what happened to your face? Just kidding, I know

Of course, there are some obvious and unavoidable similarities between The Last Jedi and Empire Strikes Back. Rey is undergoing jedi training on an isolated planet with a reluctant mentor just as Luke did with Yoda, while her friends are off traveling, but the trailer doesn’t focus on those similarities. Like many sequels it feels darker than The Force Awakens. Luke is clearly in a hopeless place and Kylo’s angst seems even greater than before. Plus with the recent passing of Carrie Fisher, the film is going to carry a certain weight that The Force Awakens didn’t have. I’m sure you’ll find me sobbing anytime General Leia is onscreen.

Screen Shot 2017-10-09 at 10.46.59 PM

I’m already crying

There’s not really much I can say about this trailer that a million other more dedicated Star Wars fans haven’t said already, but the trailer did awaken (haha! Get it? Like the force was awakened in Rey. I’m sorry.) an excitement in me that I wasn’t really feeling about this film before. I’m not buying a ticket yet and will probably wait to see the movie until well after its release on December 15th, but consider my interests piqued and my expectations high!

A Tribute to George A. Romero’s Night of the Living Dead

Today, horror film fans all over the world are weeping at the loss of the great George Romero, myself included. Inventor of the modern day movie zombie, Romero’s first feature length film, Night of the Living Dead (1968), is a classic in the horror genre. You can’t claim to be a horror fan if you’ve never seen Night of the Living Dead. (If you haven’t seen it, luckily it’s available on YouTube for free, so stop whatever you’re doing right now and go watch it. Plus there are spoilers below. Come back here when you’re done. I’ll wait.) I can’t even begin to list all of the reasons this movie is so important, but I’m going to do my best to touch on as many as I can in this post.

smaller zombies eating

The actors ate roasted ham covered in chocolate sauce so basically just as disgusting as eating human flesh

While zombie movies did exist before Night of the Living Dead was released in 1968, they were mostly depicted as reanimated human corpses, or, as in White Zombie (1932) (which is considered the first zombie movie ever made) as mindless, unthinking human bodies controlled by magic or some other force. Romero was the first to give zombies their cannibalistic appetites, and the first to make their only weakness be destroying the brain. Now, these are standard rules of every zombie movie, in fact these two are the few rules established by Night of the Living Dead that are not broken nowadays. Even though, the word “zombie” is never mentioned in Night of the Living Dead, (“those things” or “ghouls” being the movie’s preferred terminology) fans quickly began to refer to Romero’s undead as zombies, and no zombie film has been the same since.

Romero’s film didn’t just give us zombies in the form that we know them today; Night of the Living Dead also provided future zombie movies with a blueprint for character types. Barbara serves as the helpless traumatized victim, Mr. Cooper as the belligerent and selfish problem causer, and Ben is the capable, coolheaded hero. These characters reappear in film after film, hitting many of the same beats and causing the same problems over and over again. Night of the Living Dead also introduced the terrifying idea of a child zombie murdering and devouring her own parents. Nowadays, we recognize all of these tropes immediately when watching a zombie movie but in 1968 Night of the Living Dead was the first to present them.


Duane Jones as Ben a BAMF

In addition to creating these long-lasting tropes, Romero’s film is also one the first horror films to cast a black actor as the lead and hero of the film. While Romero always maintained that Duane Jones was cast as Ben because he gave the best audition, it’s impossible to ignore the implications of such a choice in 1968 when black actors were rarely cast in lead roles, especially in films with an otherwise all-white cast. Not only is Ben a black lead character, he also outlives every other character hiding out in the farmhouse, which as horror fans know is remarkable in itself for any black character in a horror film. Unfortunately, Ben doesn’t survive the movie, but his death is shockingly poignant.

After surviving the night by fighting off zombies and narrowly avoiding death by human error, Ben comes up from the cellar in the morning just as a group of local militiamen come through sweeping the area and disposing of the ghouls. Without even checking to see if there are any survivors in the house, one man raises his gun and shoots Ben directly in the head, assuming he is one of the reanimated corpses. It’s a harrowing and unsettling final scene. To think that Ben survived such a terrible night only to be killed just as the undead crisis was ending is heartbreaking. It’s not at all uncommon for the hero to die in horror films, but I’ve always found Ben’s death to be quite upsetting, as it seems so easily avoidable. Undoubtedly this ending was powerful back in 1968 but it’s taken on a new significance in light of recent similar tragic incidences in real life when a white man with a gun immediately assume that a black man is a threat without hesitation. Romero may have never intended to make a horror film with such a biting racial commentary, but it exists nonetheless and it is just becoming more relevant.

Without Romero’s Night of the Living Dead, the zombie films of today would not exist. There would be no The Walking Dead, no World War Z, no Resident Evil, no 28 Days Later. While the merits of those series are debatable, without Romero we also wouldn’t have horror films with biting social and racial commentary like Jordan Peele’s Get Out (2017). So although it will be difficult to go on living in a world without George A. Romero, at least we still have his films to provide inspiration to future filmmakers.

RIP George. We’ll miss you.

they're coming to get you barbara

Name a more iconic line

Happy Independence Day Day!

Happy Independence Day, America!

I like to celebrate holidays by watching movies, so you know the same thing I do every other day of the year. In honor of today’s festivities I watched a July 4th favorite of mine, Independence Day (1996). If you’ve seen it, you already know that this movie has everything you could ever want in a summer blockbuster: aliens, explosions, the corniest one-liners. There is no other day of the year more appropriate for this movie, so I hope that while you eat your hamburgers and hotdogs you’ll sit down to watch this American classic. If you still need some convincing, here’s a list of reasons why I absolutely love this movie.

  • It’s hilariously convenient that a global alien invasion happens over the 4th of July weekend.
  • It’s extra hilarious that even though this is a global invasion, there are three spaceships over three different U.S. cities, and the film is mostly only concerned with what happens in the United States.
  • R.E.M.’s “It’s the End of the World” plays in one of the opening scenes.
  • Jeff Goldblum.
  • Every time Harvey Fierstein yells “David!”
  • When David rides his bike through the office while everyone is in full panic mode, and he stops to chastise someone for not recycling a soda can.
  • I don’t think Randy Quaid is even acting in this movie. Russell is just Randy Quaid if Quaid believed aliens abducted him.
  • Miguel saving his sister from almost having sex with that asshole Joey from 10 Things I Hate About You.
  • The aliens come here just to destroy our monuments.white house
  • I live in LA and had to google what building the spaceship is directly above because LA just doesn’t have recognizable skyscrapers.
  • Will Smith punches an alien (not for the last time either) and says, “Welcome to Earth”
  • Every single one of Will Smith’s one-liners
    close encounter
    • “Elvis has left the building!”
    • “I have got to get me one of these!”
    • “No, you did NOT shoot that green shit at me!”
  • Was crazy Quaid right all along? Was he actually abducted by aliens? I think so.
  • Area 51 is real and the president didn’t even know.
  • Will Smith dragging an alien through the desert.
  • Data from Star Trek: The Next Generation almost unrecognizable as the mad scientist who has clearly been held against his will in Area 51 for who knows how many years.
  • The speech that President Bill Pullman gives at the end of the movie is better than any speech the current president has ever given.

I seriously could go on forever. This movie is a ridiculous and amazing summer blockbuster that should be immediately added to your 4th of July watch list. If nothing on this list convinces you of that, then tell me in the comments what movie I should be watching today instead!

Today we celebrate our Independence Day!


My Favorite Fathers in Film

For Mother’s Day, I gave you a list of some of the worst mothers on television, but this week in honor of Father’s Day, I’m going in a slightly different direction. Below you’ll find a list of some of my favorite fathers in film! Notice here that I just said favorite (not best) because few parents are perfect, even fictional ones, but the men on this list embody some characteristics that all of the best fathers have, including my own.

Mac MacGuff from Juno (2007)

juno dad

Best dadvice ever

Played by the ever-delightful J.K. Simmons, Mac MacGuff is the father of titular pregnant teen, Juno. Few fathers would be able to keep their cool like Mac does when his daughter sits him down to confess that she’s pregnant. He doesn’t yell at Juno or send her to her room. He doesn’t demand she get an abortion or force her into a teenage marriage. Instead when Juno tells him that she intends to give the baby up for adoption, he listens to her and agrees to support her decision. He even goes with her to meet the adoptive parents. Of course he isn’t pleased with Juno’s situation, he even wonders if it’s his fault that she’s ended up in this position, but regardless he continues to love and support his daughter. He offers her advice and guidance without trying to control her thoughts or actions because he understands that his daughter is an individual person in charge of her own life.

Daniel Hillard from Mrs. Doubtfire (1993)


I’ve mentioned before that I really love cross-dressing movies, and this won’t be the last time I mention it either because I love when traditional gender lines are blurred. Mrs. Doubtfire is one of my favorite cross-dressing movies for a myriad of reasons but one of those reasons is the strong sincere love that Daniel Hillard has for his children. I can’t imagine that most men out there are willing to go to the lengths that Daniel goes to just to have a few more hours with his kids. Not only does Daniel learn to apply prosthetics and put on makeup, he also puts in extra hours learning how to cook and clean so that his disguise is more convincing. Through this process, he also learns how to be a better father than he was before the divorce. He stops being the cool, fun dad and starts being a real parent. The fact that he had to pretend to be a woman to learn to be a better parent is a topic for another blog post.

Henry Jones from Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (1989)


An accurate representation of me talking to my dad

Henry Jones is far from a perfect father, but then Indiana Jones isn’t always the greatest son either. I love Henry Jones because he is everything that dads are in real life. He is stubborn and annoying and critical of Indiana, but as they go on their adventure finding treasure and fighting Nazis, it’s easy to see that Henry and Indiana love each other. Plus it’s so fun to see them share their passion for archeology and adventure together. Through all of their differences and petty arguments the Jones men still love each other, which is apparent when Indiana risks everything just to save his father’s life at the end of the movie.

Clark Griswold from National Lampoon’s Vacation series

clark griswold

Clark’s skill as a parent is certainly questionable, and he’s not necessarily a great role model for children or adults. However, when there are so many movies and TV shows that depict fathers as doing everything in their power to avoid their families, it’s so nice to see a man who so badly wants to give his family the perfect vacation. Of course everything goes wrong, and Clark is responsible for quite a few of those mishaps, but still every Vacation movie ends with the Griswold family happily together as a unit. Plus he definitely gives his kids vacations they’ll never forget.

None of these dads are perfect, but the best parts of them are characteristics that all great fathers have. They’re loving, passionate, and they respect their children, which is really all that matters to kids, and that’s what makes them my favorite fathers in film. There are so many more that I could’ve included on this list. Tell me your favorite movie dads in the comments!

Wonder Woman is the hero I’ve been waiting for

Of course I’m writing about Wonder Woman this week. How could I not? It’s the movie that everyone is talking about right now and for good reasons. I wasn’t sure what to expect when I walked into the theater yesterday afternoon to see this movie because there really isn’t another film like this. Sure, back in the early 2000s we had Catwoman (2004) and Elektra (2005), which were both female lead superhero movies, but they’re both terrible and came long before superhero movies began to dominate the box office every summer. So many people went to see Wonder Woman this weekend and left thinking they had just seen a great movie (the best DC movie since The Dark Knight in my opinion), but they may not realize the significance of this movie. It’s incredibly important for so many reasons, and I’m excited to see what this film’s success might lead to for women characters and women filmmakers.

Wonder Woman as a character has existed for 76 years. Let me say that again. She has existed as a superhero since 1941, and she is just now getting the big screen blockbuster treatment. For comparison Iron Man and Spider-Man have only been around since the 60s, and Deadpool’s only been on the scene since ’91, yet they all got their origin movies before her. Even if the movie were terrible, Wonder Woman would still be significant just because it exists. There is no other movie with a superhero female lead that isn’t an offshoot of an originally male superhero series. Like I said before, we’ve had Catwoman, Elektra, and even a Supergirl movie in the 80’s, but all of these characters only exist because Batman, Daredevil, and Superman existed first. They are side characters that got their own spin-off, but Wonder Woman is her own character upon which her own franchise can be built.

Plus, Wonder Woman is a true superhero in every sense of the word, but the most significant to me is her super-strength. Catwoman, Black Widow, and countless other female superheroes often don’t possess this defining characteristic of superheroism. Wonder Woman is literally stronger than every man she comes into contact with, and it was so powerful to see her up there on that big screen smashing buildings and throwing men around like they were paper people. When she rises up out of the trenches in her first big battle scene, literally entering “No Man’s Land,” I nearly cried real tears. I’ve never seen a female character do this is in a movie before. As she deflected every bullet that flew at her and brought down bad guys with her Lasso of Truth, she gained ground and took on an entire army by herself, while her male sidekicks followed behind her.

out of the trenches

wonder woman battle gif

The scene that made me weep with joy

Wonder Woman is also unlike many recent superheroes in that she is optimistic, idealistic, and caring. She doesn’t possess the arrogance of Iron Man or the brooding cynicism of Batman. She’s a hopeful superhero, which is something desperately needed in the world right now. She fights for truth, justice, and love, not out of vengeance or some sort of obligatory duty. She fights for the world to be the utopia that she grew up in where people support and love one another. If this is what female characters can bring to rejuvenate the superhero genre, then I am here for that.

Aside from Wonder Woman’s place as one of the first films with a female superhero lead, it’s also making waves in other ways. If you’ve been on the Internet at all today, then I’m sure you’ve heard that Wonder Woman broke the US box office record for a female directed movie. Surpassing the previous record set by Sam Taylor-Johnson’s Fifty Shades of Grey, Wonder Woman made $100.5 million in the US this weekend, and $223 million worldwide. If you’re not obsessed with film and television like I am, you might be wondering why this is such a big deal. Luckily, I’m here to tell you why it matters.

Hollywood cares about one thing and one thing alone. Money. This is especially true of big studio productions like Wonder Woman. The amount of money that a picture makes is the only thing that really matters to studio executives, and those executives are the ones who decide which movies get made and who makes them. Most of these executives are men, and most directors of big budget movies are men. In fact, the Directors Guild of America’s Diversity Report found that in 2013 and 2014 women accounted for only 6.4% of film directors. That number drops to just 3.1% for films that earned more than $10 million at the box office. Worse still is the fact that minority female directors make up just 1.3% of directors in those years.

Patty Jenkins, director of Wonder Woman, was able to achieve something that few women rarely do because they are rarely given the chance. She directed a film with an estimated budget of $150 million and her movie made all of that back in its first weekend. Jenkins directed just one other feature film before Wonder Woman, Monster (2003) with Charlize Theron starring as notorious serial killer Aileen Wuornos, and most of her directing work was in television. Hopefully, she is just the first of many women who will no longer be looked over as directors simply because they haven’t been given the opportunity to prove themselves.

The monetary and critical success of Wonder Woman this weekend may finally be the signal that Hollywood needs to begin trusting women directors with big budget movies. I saw this movie on a Sunday afternoon and the theater was packed. Women are making up 52% of the audience going to see Wonder Woman, which just proves what I already know, people want to see stories about women made by women. The proof is there in the numbers, so maybe I can finally stop shouting out my window, “HEY HOLLYWOOD! WE WANT MORE MOVIES ABOUT WOMEN. THEY WILL MAKE MONEY. MAKE MORE!”

When I left the movie theater on Sunday, I felt so empowered by Wonder Woman’s strength and her heart. I’ve never seen a movie like this one before, and I can only imagine what it would’ve been like to see this movie when I was a young girl. I sincerely hope that the success of this film means that changes are coming in big budget blockbuster movies, both on-screen and behind the scenes. But progress is slow, and we often regress. Here’s hoping Wonder Woman is strong enough to finally break through that glass ceiling.